I met a friend for lunch today. He's a smart, handsome man with a great sense of humour who I absolutely adore. I always enjoy his company, usually a bit too much and a bit too long and this lunch was no exception. For some reason, probably because all I had was salad, albeit the tastiest and most expensive salad ever, the wine had gone to my head by the time I wandered back to my cubicle 2 hours later.
Fortunately I had finished all my work before I left so I answered a few personal e-mails and was surfing the internet when my boss came to my desk to say goodbye. She's taking holidays next week so I will never see her again. This meant I had to pretend I was sad and believed her when she said how much they were going to miss me. This is not entirely untrue, they probably will miss my work but my departure is nothing but a relief to her. Her underling and his banshee, two bratty bullies who manage to make most everyone miserable at some time or another, have been trying to get me fired for a year resulting in a lot of throw downs which I invariably win but are certainly not worth anyone's trouble by my estimation.
In any case she seemed to be at my desk for an interminably long time, suddenly wanting to be chatty or something, while I sat, terrified that my inebriated self might let loose with something akin to the truth. "Smile and nod, smile and nod", I thought, leaning back in my chair hoping she couldn't smell the wine. And then, with absolutely no prior warning or cues she lunged at me for a hug. Due to my alcohol delayed reaction time, and the angles-her standing with me seated- I managed to punch her in the chest while trying to ready my arms for reciprocation. She recoiled briefly but recovered almost instantaneously, completing the pass. Some people, I thought to myself, are so awkward and by some people, I definitely meant her.*
(*sidebar: I love hugs. Just not attack tackle hugs... from her)
Light on the eve of the election
12 years ago
