Long Goodbyes

"But rainbows are for skies
And hesitation is for sad regretful eyes"
  -Lowest of the Low

In the morning I realize I don't have enough money left to pay the hotel bill so I set out to walk to the only ATM on the other side of town. As I cross the street I spot Nathan and assume he's heading to his dive but when I get closer I can see something's wrong.

"After we left the Corner I went back to my boat but the engine wouldn't start so I had no way of getting back to the yacht."

Some locals had stopped to help him and offered him a place to sleep but still he looks worn out. Watching his face as he speaks I have to consciously resist the urge to reach up and try to smooth out the wrinkles around his eyes and tell him to reconsider his dive today as I'm having visions of him making a fatal error in his fatigued state; I would sound like someone's mother and besides he, like me, wouldn't listen anyway. Instead I say simply, "Take care," and give him one last hug before I turn to go, already late for our flight.

"Hey," he calls after me, "don't behave yourself."

The two smarmy men are sitting outside our hotel room again.

"Are you leaving today?" Asks the muscled one, with slicked down hair and mirror shades. His friend, with bad skin and oversized head, is Japanese and doesn't speak English.

I nod.

"Where are you going?"

"Bali."

"Oh yeah? Us too. Where are you staying in Bali?"

"I'm not sure," I answer vaguely, "I think Legian. We're meeting our friend there. She booked the hotel."

He nods but I can tell he knows I'm prevaricating.

"Well, why don't we meet tonight? We'll take you out, celebrate the New Year."

"Thanks but we're going to another friend's party."

He nods, waiting for an invite but I don't offer him one.

Adik comes outside then and he turns his attention to her. She falls into a too easy conversation with them and I am amazed again at how poor her judgement is. Is she really that naive? That innocent? I know she's not. She's wily. She lies, she cheats, she steals. Even to, and from, me. I stay close but I realize all too late that she's telling him everything he wants to know about her, about us, about where we are staying, including the address of our hotel.

"Hey," she says to me in English, "they're on our plane. Do you want to share a taxi? It's free!"

Dear, sweet Adik. Nothing, in a man's world, is free.

But I nod.

In the cab, Smarmy asks if I have a boyfriend. When I say "Yes" Adik looks at me wide-eyed at the unhesitating lie, but I don't flinch.

"Is he Javanese?"

"Australian," I say, staring out the window. Australia is so convenient.

Our flight is scheduled to leave at 8:00 am but by 10 there's still no sign of it.

The precocious boy from Rinca is there though. "The head's the heaviest part of the human body, you know, that's why I'm vigorously exercising my neck." he says strapping a loaded duffle bag to the top of his head. "I'm reading a book about Artemis and Apollo. She liked to hunt. Do you like to hunt?" By the time he announces "Wow, that bathroom stinks like butt waste" I am convinced I am in a Kids in the Hall  sketch with Gavin.

I go outside and stare forlornly at the mountains beyond the landing strip. We're on the homestretch and I am not sure I have the fortitude to return to Batam.

Adik materializes beside me, wide eyed and frightened.

"Do you know, that man asked me to go with him tonight."

I shrug. "And?"

"And I said no but he wants me to sleep with him tonight."

I sigh. "Well, that's going to happen to you. You're a beautiful girl. Men are going to try and get you to sleep with them."

"He said no sex. He said he is a good man, a police man. I said my brother is also a police man but he is not good."

I don't know what to tell her. She's already given him all the information he needs to find her, and me for that matter.

"When we get to the hotel I will talk to the front desk and tell them if anyone comes looking for us they should say we never checked in. This is why, Adik, you should never tell anyone where you are staying when you travel."

When the flight finally arrives at noon, Adik and I choose separate seats. She spent most of her time in Labuan Bajo at the internet cafe, or locked up in our hotel room. We no longer give high fives and utter the blessing "bismillah" before starting a new leg of our journey like we did when we set out. We barely even look at each other.